Fred (Lucas Cruikshank) is a 15 year old boy with a crush on the girl next door, Judy (Pixie Lott). However, the local bully, Kevin (Jake Weary), constantly thwarts his attempts to see her. When Judy moves house, Fred seeks advice from his imprisoned father (John Cena), whom Fred imagines helping him in times of need. Fred decides to go on an epic quest across town (you heard right) to go and see Judy and tell her how he feels.
The plot doesn’t really become any more than this, being more of a set up for slapstick than an actual story, and it doesn’t develop at all. The screenwriter obviously read a ˜Dummies Guide to Script-writing’ as the ˜plot’ has plenty of ‘Chekov’s Guns’ (something that is obviously placed into the film to be specifically used later) throughout the story, but these are resolved unbearably quickly and are completely pointless, serving neither plot nor character. These desperate attempts to add depth to a film like this highlights just shows us how shallow the film really is.
The performances by Lucas Cruikshank, Pixie Lott, and Jake Weary range from irritatingly over-the-top (Fred and Kevin) to bland and wooden (Judy). It’s a shame, because I think Pixie Lott does have potential, but she just doesn’t give anything to the role. It should be noted that Lott has the worst English accent since Dick Van Dyke ˜Cor blimied’ his way through Mary Poppins, a fact made even more shocking by the fact that she is actually from England. It truly takes a special type of film to make the audience disbelieve in the truth.
Overall, it’s an unfunny, badly directed, badly acted, terribly written mess. To give you a sense of where it falls in the comedy stakes, it lacks the subtlety of Freddy Got Fingered, Deuce Bigalow or anything starring Kevin James.
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